That distinction belongs to circumference measurements and your camera phone.
And the tape measure and scantily clad photos that your attention-whoring ass posts on social media under the guise of progress photos aren’t showing any change either.
What the fuck?!?!
It was only a few weeks ago that fat was dripping off your body.
Dripping off like chocolate soft serve ice cream with sprinkles on a waffle cone on a warm summer day, which I have no idea why you’re craving for all of a sudden.
But now, nothing!
Everything has come to a screeching halt.
Before your quitter instincts kick in and you do your usual throwing in the towel routine out of sheer frustration, let me tell you that what you’re experiencing is a fat loss plateau and it’s very common among losers such as yourself.
Now knowing that, if you would like to use this as the perfect opportunity to stop doing this eat right and move around bullshit, then be my guest.
Your friend, family member, coworker, stranger you follow on social media who you place more trust in than you fucking should, is probably doing fasted cardio and telling you about all the great results they’re getting.
So you’re probably thinking about doing fasted cardio because, fuck, if a shitload of people are doing something then it must be something you have to do too.
Because it has to be a good thing or else so many people wouldn’t be doing it…like investing money with Bernie Madoff.
Talk about a sure thing!
Yup, it has to be good if everybody and their mom is doing it!
Is fasted cardio among the many, many things the masses have been right about?
It breaks whatever’s left of my wee wittle heart that people don’t love leg day to the moon and back.
I’m truly saddened by our living in a world where there are people who don’t love leg day enough to call it “bae” and other idiotic pet names; that don’t love leg day enough to write love letters to it; or that don’t love leg day enough to have put a ring on it yet.
I mean, how can you not love leg day with every fiber of your being?
Speaking of fibers, when other than leg day can you feel every muscle fiber begging and pleading for you to stop? But unless you’re a pussy, you don’t. Instead, you keep challenging your testicular fortitude (or, because I’m not a sexist jerk, ovarian stick-to-itiveness).
Oh leg day, how I adore thee!!!
…but I’m the exception, not the norm.
Go to virtually any gym and what do you see?
Nothing but leg day skipping gym brahs with light bulb physiques.
Light bulb physiques?
Yeah, they’re big up top and have nothing on the bottom.
Not being mindful of what you put in your mouth is killing you!
By no means am I talking about the new drug-resistant “super gonorrhea” out there that has you up at night regretting your drunken debauchery with that stripper at that bachelor/bachelorette party a few weekends ago.