Why on earth would you ever eat fucking eggs?!?!, you ask incredulously.
Good question!
Eggs = 🤮
After all, chickens only have one posterior opening for their digestive, excretory, and reproductive tracts, meaning that everything comes out this hole, or cloaca, whether it be pee, feces, or eggs. So yeah, unless you’re some kinda weirdo who’s into chicken butt food, the thought of putting eggs in your mouth is a double yuck 🤮
But here’s the thing… Continue reading Egg Nutrition Facts
It’s that annual time of the year to celebrate the women who made use of their vaginas to bring life into this world rather than just as pleasure holes.
So if you’re a mom, that means you’re likely to receive cards, flowers, and gifts from your kids. What else is likely is a special brunch or dinner at a restaurant.
So how should you handle your special day?
Well, if your kids aren’t grown, you should probably know that the tokens of appreciation from them are really from the person you had the child with because young kids are broke largely in part to some assholes thinking it should be illegal for children to work so that they can enjoy childhood before spending the rest of their woebegone days in drudgery on this planet. So fuck hugging and kissing your glory-hogging brats. Instead, direct that gratitude to the person who really deserves it! And if you’re a single mom who doesn’t have a partner in the picture, then the money for the items given to you by your children will more than likely come from you in some shape or form. That means that you’re the one who bought yourself your Mother’s Day cards, flowers, and gifts, so hug and kiss yourself!
That’s how you should handle your special day, toots!
…
Oh, wait, you were only asking about the food aspect?
Whoops!
Anyway, that’s easy! Continue reading Mother’s Day Nutrition Tips
A lot of people try to blame fast-food restaurants for their weight gain.
Are you one of those people?
If you happen to be, your finger shouldn’t be pointed at McDonald’s or elsewhere.
Instead, it should be pointed squarely at you!
Don’t want to do cardio on a machine?1After all, there are only but so many miles you can say “FML” to yourself before prematurely stopping your cardio session to blow your brains out.
Or maybe you want to do cardio between sets to keep your heart rate elevated so you burn more calories for fat loss?2Yeah, you can actually do that instead of playing on your phone until your next set! Running in place, burpees, and other light aerobic activity between sets not only helps burn more calories but active rest has also been shown to increase exercise performance and help build more muscle.
Jumping rope answers both, as it’s not as boring as traditional cardio and you can perform it anywhere.3While jump roping can indeed be done anywhere, it must be done especially in a packed gym right in front of the dumbbell rack so people have to wait to get their weights for fear of getting whipped in the face. Either that, or smack dab in the middle of a walkway so people have to take the circuitous path around you for fear of getting whipped in the face. By no means should you jump rope in an area of the gym where there’s enough space for that shit!!! But not only does jump roping have excitement and convenience going for it, it’s also the most efficient form of cardio on the planet. Just by simply jumping over a piece of rope for a relatively short amount of time, you can get a workout that recruits all the muscles in the body, burns a shitload of calories, builds bone density, and improves your motor skills, balance, and coordination. As an added benefit, a jump rope can double as a garrote to creep up on someone from behind and then choke them out so you can easily discard them from the machine they were camped out twiddling their thumbs on. Oh, and jump roping is also low impact on the joints! Continue reading Jump Rope
Is squatting bad for your back?
You know, you’ve probably heard conflicting things from different people, with some having horror stories about how squats have destroyed their back and others saying the complete opposite. So what’s the deal? Should you do ’em?
Well, it depends… Continue reading Is Squatting Bad For Your Back?
