Q: I’d like to be in better shape at the last minute of an island vacation that I booked several months ago and have been looking forward to every day since. That’s right, the event is by no means a surprise to me! So yeah, how do you get a six-pack fast?!?! Please help me so that during my trip, a new whale sighting record for the period isn’t set from all the times I take my shirt off and swim in the ocean!!! Continue reading How Do You Get A Six-Pack Fast?
verb [kip·ing]
to perform a variation of pull-ups designed for those who can’t do pull-ups so they can claim they can do more pull-ups than those who can actually do pull-ups. see also: BOGUS
noun [kuh·lawr·ik def·uh·sit]
1. when the body has less calories to operate on than the calories required to maintain current body weight, which is what still hasn’t been beaten into your head yet that weight loss is all about. see also: SERIOUSLY
2. the negative energy balance that simply not eating so much shit can create but you’d much rather rely on physical activity for so you can burn a couple of calories and then almost immediately cancel those calories out as soon as you eat something. see also: EVERYBODY
Q: My friends and family say I have a big ass attached to my hip. Unfortunately, they’re speaking about my partner and not in reference to my glutes. Despite all the booty building shit I’m doing, I’m flatter back there than the Earth is! Wait, the planet is round, you say? Ha, whatever your brainwashed head says, sheep!!! Anyway, why aren’t my glutes growing?!?! Continue reading Why Aren’t My Glutes Growing?
noun [step·mil]
a machine with a rotating staircase that gives away women’s oral sex techniques, as their cranking the speed up and using their hands to hold onto the rails lets every guy in the gym know what else they use their hands for. see also: DISAPPOINTMENT
