Category: Q&A

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How Do You Make Up For A Missed Day At The Gym?

How Do You Make Up For A Missed Day At The Gym?

Q: How do you make up for a missed day at the gym? See, I regularly go to the gym after work three days per week. This week, however, I won’t be able to make it on one of my scheduled days at my usual time because I have to appear to be a good employee and attend a voluntary work function after work that’s really not voluntary, which kinda defeats the fucking purpose of the word “voluntary”. Continue reading How Do You Make Up For A Missed Day At The Gym?

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Why Are You Eating Less But Not Losing Weight?

Why Are You Eating Less But Not Losing Weight?

Q: Hey, why are motherfuckers like you always pointing to research that says that slimming down is about eating less food? If that’s true, then why am I doing that but not losing weight?!?! Grrrrrrrrr…I’m this close — THIS CLOSE!!! — to chalking this up as another thing we’ve been lied to about by scientists like climate change and humans being responsible for it! Continue reading Why Are You Eating Less But Not Losing Weight?

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How Do You Clean Up After Yourself At The Gym?

How Do You Clean Up After Yourself At The Gym?

Q: People have been complaining about me at the gym. Apparently, there’s some kind of policy that you have to clean up after yourself and I haven’t. That shit is a totally alien concept to me, so what’s the proper procedure? Oh yeah, and can you also make sure I’m inconveniencing as many people as possible with whatever you suggest so I can comply while being passive-aggressive? Thanks! Continue reading How Do You Clean Up After Yourself At The Gym?

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Are Squats Dangerous?

Are Squats Dangerous?

Q: Are squats dangerous? See, I love walking all over my significant other and I kinda need good knees to continue doing that. Well, not really because I don’t literally walk all over my partner to do something beneficial like an Ashiatsu massage to help relieve their stress, for example. Instead, how I walk all over them is figuratively by treating them badly and without respect. But still, you get the point! Continue reading Are Squats Dangerous?

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Do You Have To Eat Healthy To Lose Weight?

Do You Have To Eat Healthy To Lose Weight?

Q: My partner just told me that they’re going to end things between us because of my hang-ups in the bedroom. Given that it appears to be true that you have to eat ass for a relationship to last nowadays, is it also true that you have to eat healthy to lose weight? Fuck, I might as well drop a few pounds to make myself presentable to the next woman I’m going to disappoint sexually… Continue reading Do You Have To Eat Healthy To Lose Weight?