Oatmeal Nutrition Facts

Why on earth would you ever eat fucking oatmeal?!?!, you ask incredulously.⁣⁣⁣

Good question!⁣⁣⁣
⁣⁣⁣
Oatmeal = 🤮⁣⁣⁣

But here’s the thing…

What makes oatmeal particularly attractive is that it’s one of a small handful of foods that contain high amounts of resistant starch. And what exactly is resistant starch?, you ask. Well, it’s a type of starch that’s resistant.

DUH!!!

Anyway, resistant starch is resistant to digestion, enabling it to pass through the stomach and small intestine without being absorbed into the body. It’s that ability of resistant starch that has the effect of helping to feed gut bacteria, which itself has the effect of improving gastrointestinal health and possibly protecting against conditions like colon cancer and diverticulitis. Also, when resistant starch passes through the small intestine, it breaks down into short-chain fatty acids, like butyrate, which help with weight management by increasing the rate of post-meal fat burn by at least 30 percent.

What else oatmeal has going for it is its fiber content, particularly beta-glucan, a soluble fiber that’s linked to many health benefits. Examples of these benefits include promotion of a healthy balance of bacteria in the gut flora to improve the symptoms of irritable bowel syndrome; lowering of total and “bad” LDL cholesterol through a complicated process that essentially inhibits the uptake of dietary cholesterol and its reabsorption in bile acids; and slowing the absorption of sugar into the bloodstream to help regulate blood glucose and insulin levels.

Another thing that fiber does is take the body a long time to digest, which reduces appetite by helping to keep you full. That means that with oatmeal, you can experience the feeling of fullness somewhere in your life because, Lord knows, the limp dick lame you’ve been fucking isn’t getting the job done elsewhere.

Yeah, I know, oatmeal sounds mighty, mighty tasty right about now!

NOTE: To reap the benefits of resistant starch, you have to eat the oats raw or toasted, make overnight oats, or let your cooked oatmeal sit for several hours.

Oatmeal Nutrition Facts
Serving Size 1/2 cup dry (40g)

Glossary: fat