noun [fi·zeek]
1. the structure, appearance, and development of the body; generally used by men to talk about other men’s bodies without fear of being seen as gay for talking about, and even admiring, another man’s body. see also: OBVIOUSLY
2. separate male and female bodybuilding divisions that everyone who doesn’t compete in gives less than a fuck about no matter how much competitors and federations try to act like we should. see also: IDGAF
noun [free·kwuhn·see]
the number of times you work out per week, or at least claim to so you can use the gym as an alibi for where you are when meeting with the person you’re having an affair with for a different type of workout. see also: BUSINESS TRIP
noun [string·er]
a tank top that’s specially designed for people with muscles to show off their muscles but is somehow primarily worn by people without muscles to show off their lack of them.
noun [ad·uh·pohs]
1. fancy-schmancy way of saying body fat, as if you’re carrying less of it by referring to it by a highfalutin name.
Example of Adipose in a Sentence
“My body, my choice” is a feminist slogan that most often involves issues of abortion. Since that’s all about bodily autonomy, I’m sure what words I want to use when talking about my body also apply. So listen here: if I want to be pedantic and refer to my fat by its technical name of adipose, then so be it, MOTHERFUCKER!!!
2. that thing you’re carrying around more of than the childhood trauma that’s weighing you down just as much. see also: TONY SOPRANO
Example of adipose in a Sentence
Some would say I’m obese because I eat too much and the amount of adipose in my body is greater than the amount of lean mass. Me? I would say I’m big boned and that’s what’s responsible for what the scale says. I guess we’ll just have to have a difference of opinion!
noun [jim]
1. short for gymnasium, it’s that place you pay a monthly fee to go exercise at but never actually go. see also: AFFLUENCE
2. a room or building housing a variety of machines, weights, and other equipment but where, somehow, only the bench press is ever used. see also: MTWTFSS
3. a place that’s used as a backdrop to take selfies to mix up your social media feed.
