No Time To Work Out: A Bullshit Excuse
With all the critically essential shit you have to do throughout the course of the day, there’s just no time to work out. You can’t possibly fit it into your busy schedule.
Trust me, I get it.
…
On second thought, don’t trust me!
I actually DON’T get it because you and I both know you having no time is just one of the bullshit lies that you keep telling yourself.
How do I know such things about your full-of-shitness? You mean, other than via my omniscience?!?!
Well, it boils down to the fact that there’s a difference between people like me and people like you.
One difference has already been touched on when I asked you whether you’re exercising or training, but there’s something else separating people like me from people like you.
I mean, besides the obvious.
Like, who else has these dashing good looks?!
Certainly not you!
So if not that, then what’s separating people like me from people like you?
People like moi?1That’s “me” in Frenchy talk. You’d be bilingual too if you had bothered to pay attention to those Pepé Le Pew cartoons like moi!
People such as yours truly?!
What’s so different about us?!?!
Well, we’re NEVER too busy to find time to go to the gym — we always find it.
There’s NEVER no time to work out — we always make time for it.
You see, we schedule our day around our workout plans.
Our number one priority — and if it isn’t numero uno, it’s somewhere right up there at the top of the damn list — is taking our ass to the motherfucking gym.2Numero uno means “number one” en español, which translates to “in Spanish” in inglés, which translates to “in English” en español.
If something pops up that threatens our normal gym flow, then on the day of the intervening event we’ll avert disaster by training earlier or later than our regularly scheduled time and/or cut down the length of our training session if we can still make it but time is tight. If, however, going to the gym is completely out of the realm of possibility, we’ll move the weight training session to some date well ahead or immediately after the interruption.
We’ll find a way to train regardless of what’s going on in our life so as not to use that as an excuse for not doing what we’re supposed to do to reach our fitness goal(s).
That’s consistency.
That’s why the people with the superhuman strength you covet so much are as strong as they are. That’s why the people with the comic book bodies you’re envious of look the way they look.
¿Y tu?3That’s español for “and you?” Please, don’t mind me, I’m just showing off my four years of high school Spanish. Look at me, being polyglot and shit. I know you’re jealous, all hating on my worldliness!
People like you?!
Not so much.
You’re ALWAYS too busy to find time to go to the gym — you never find it.
There’s ALWAYS no time to work out — you never make time for it.
That’s because your life doesn’t revolve around training.
For you, working out is somewhere at the bottom of your daily priorities.
To you, training is a chore, a simple afterthought.
It’s not part of your fiber.
So bad weather, sickness, a hectic job schedule, out-of-town work assignment, broken down car, religious holidays, vacations, weddings, funerals, bar mitzvahs, dance recitals, your kid’s soccer tournament, PTA meetings, the juggling of an extramarital affair, whatever you can think of, are enough to throw your best-laid fitness plans out of whack and cause you to take unplanned time off.
That’s inconsistency.
That’s why you’re still struggling to open up that pickle jar and why you have a body you wouldn’t even wish on your worst enemy.
Shit happens.
It’s part of life.
The dividing line between people like you and people like me isn’t that we’re losers who have endless hours at our disposal to pursue fitness.
Contrary to popular belief, the majority of us have regular lives with regular jobs and regular families, all of which have their own stressors that take up our energy.
No, what separates us is how we make time our bitch and bend it to work in our favor in light of family, social and work obligations, evening commitments, observances, and unexpected emergencies.
That’s it.
There’s no magic formula.
It’s all about managing your day-to-day in order to achieve consistency, which goes hand-in-hand with success.
Learn how to respond to what life throws at you and you just might start seeing the results you’re not seeing because you have “no time to work out”, let alone meal prep, eat, and all the other shit you try to say you don’t have time for that are kinda sorta necessary to do.
NOW TAKE YOUR ASS TO THE MOTHERFUCKING GYM!!!4Oh, you still want to keep up the charade that you have too much going on? Then click HERE to find out how to make time for the gym with a busy schedule!
Glossary: fitness, goal, gym, priority, results, work out, workout