The Health Benefits Of Jump Roping

Are you a boxer? MMA fighter? Or even a 12-year-old girl with pigtails on the playground at recess time?

Wait, you’re not?!?!

Then why the fuck would you want to jump rope?

Because you’re reading this, you obviously don’t know why you would want to do such a thing. So maybe you should consider these five reasons, some of which will have you jumping for joy.¹Get it? You’ll be jumping for joy with your jump rope. Sorry, I couldn’t help myself! Continue reading The Health Benefits Of Jump Roping

Why on earth would you ever eat a fucking apple?!?!, you ask incredulously.

Good question!⁣⁣⁣

Apples = 🤮

And not only are apples 🤮⁣⁣ because they taste 🤮⁣⁣ but further adding to the 🤮⁣⁣ of apples is that an apple is also the logo of a tech company that (1) makes and sells grossly overpriced and overrated gadgets and (2) has a legion of increasingly annoying cult customers who wrap themselves in the brand identity and do free promotion for the company like they have a vested interest in it when they don’t because they don’t even own shares.⁣

Yeah, talk about 🤮

Considering those things, no one can certainly blame you for not wanting anything to do with shit associated with apples, but here’s the thing… Continue reading Apple Nutrition Facts

Healthy Sandwich Ideas

Before you make that popular sandwich packed with sodium, fat, and hundreds of extra calories, the first thing you should do is make your sandwich on whole-grain bread for the fiber that keeps you feeling fuller longer.¹Look for the words “100% whole-grain” or “100% whole-wheat” on the label. Don’t fall for the trap of buying bread that doesn’t mention a percentage on its package, as it’ll more than likely consist of more refined flour than whole grains. Also, make sure that wheat, oats, flax seeds, barley, buckwheat, and other whole grains are printed first on the ingredients list because that signifies that whole grains are contained in the product in the greatest amount.

The next thing you should do?

Why, that’s to keep reading!

DUH!!! Continue reading Healthy Sandwich Ideas

Power Poses For Confidence

[insert superhero theme music]

Superheroes all stand the same way, with their chest proud, head high, legs spread, elbows bent, and hands propped on their hips. Comic book artists draw superheroes this way to project power because superheroes, many of whom have superpowers, are pretty…ummmmm…powerful.

What if I told you that this comic book trope, the “superhero stance”, has real world implications?

Because that’s what I’m tellin’ ya!!! Continue reading Power Poses For Confidence

Why You Should Park Further Away

Wanna know what you can do rather than park in the handicapped space you want to park in so you can be closer to the entrance?¹Sheesh, not only do you want to illegally park in a disabled parking space but you’re also driving while reading this on your mobile device?!?! Please, somebody take away your license immediately and get you off the public roadways!!! Continue reading Why You Should Park Further Away