Category: Glossary

Posted on by

AMRAP

AMRAP

abbr [am·rap]
1. as many reps as possible, but in the context of performing an exercise movement until fatigue or the set amount of time elapses — not in regard to the approach of throwing a gauntlet of sales associates at a person to pester them with calls, texts, and emails until they finally cave into signing up for a gym membership after giving their contact info just to score a free one-day pass. see also: ATTRITION

Example of AMRAP in a Sentence
At the end of leg day, my coach currently has me doing 3 sets of squats for 20 reps, with the weight increasing every set. And then as if my legs aren’t already Jell-O by that point, he loads up the bar with even more weight and has me do the last set for AMRAP. It’s either my sheer grit or his non-stop questioning of my manhood that gets me through it. I’ll let you decide!

 

2. as many rounds as possible, but in the context of completing an exercise circuit until fatigue or the set amount of time elapses — not in regard to bouts of intercourse, which for women can be multiple but for men is not as numerous and can take longer between, with that duration differing from man to man and depending on age, health, nutrition, lifestyle, libido, and various other factors. see also: UNFAIRNESS

Example of AMRAP in a Sentence
To further make it easier for me to steal your money and not have to do anything as your personal trainer, you’re going to come up with today’s workout. So here’s the deal. Select any four exercises you want and perform each one for 12 reps for an AMRAP of 20 minutes. While you do that, I’m going to be over here giving everybody but you the undivided attention that I should be giving you but won’t despite you paying for it.

MORE WORDS
Posted on by

Abs

abs

noun [abs]
short for abdominals; to repeat, they require a low body fat percentage to be visible, which you don’t have and explains why you can’t see them and more than likely never will if you keep eating the way you do. see also: LEARNING-DISABLED

Example of Abs in a Sentence
Now, before I take another bite out of this burger with two slices of pizza acting as the buns, please tell me again how to go about getting abs as defined as yours. I’M WAITING!!!

MORE WORDS
Posted on by

StairMaster

StairMaster

noun [stair·mah·ster]
an exercise equipment company that specializes in the manufacture of stair climbing machines that make the act of stair climbing possible for people who regularly go out of their way to avoid the stairs in their daily life. see also: ELEVATOR

MORE WORDS
Posted on by

CrossFit

CrossFit

noun [kraws·fit]
1. a branded fitness regimen that’s a mashup of several activities, including sprinting, rowing, strength training, powerlifting, Olympic weightlifting, kettlebell and medicine ball training, gymnastics, plyometrics, strongman, calisthenics, jump roping, parkour, ballroom dancing, mountain climbing, juggling, carpentry, ax throwing, stone masonry, astrophysics, bobsledding, animal husbandry, and no need to continue because you should get the point by now. see also: FRANKENSTEIN

2. a relatively expensive group fitness regimen that apparently isn’t transparent enough as being bullshit to its legion of followers despite its development by a man named Greg Glassman. see also: DEVIL IS IN THE DETAILS

3. a loophole employed by pervs to allow them to violently jerk themselves in public without the fear of getting charged with the criminal offense of lewd conduct. see also: PAUL REUBENS

MORE WORDS