Rerack Your Weights: Put Shit Back…Or Else

On the fence about putting your shit back when done? Let me tell you why you should rerack your weights...

Trust me, I and others are not impressed at your uncanny ability to load the leg press machine with every 45-pound plate in the facility and then crank out “reps” with your knees barely even bending.

No, you don’t exactly dazzle us with the manner in which you grab the heaviest dumbbells and perform three sets of one struggle rep in between 15 minutes of rest.

Believe you me, neither are we bowled over with how the bar bends from all the weight you have on it as you then do some cacamamie thing that you call a squat, deadlift, bench press, whatever your imagination allows.

We can all see that you’re special in the very special sense of the word, but there’s no reason in the world for you to walk away from a station with your dumbbells still on the floor or weight still loaded on a piece of equipment as if the dumbbells and plates were an undying monument to your physical strength.

So rerack your weights, chump.

But what if ya don’t?

Like, what if leaving your weight for everyone to behold your strength is how you compensate for your baby thumb of a penis?!

Like, what if returning weight back to its proper place is beneath you because you’re of royal stock and us mere mortals are only on this earth to meet your every beck and call, such as picking up after you because lord forbid you ever lift a finger?!

Like, what if someone else putting shit back for you is your “thing,” your métier, the driving force behind you getting out of bed every morning and not doing us all the favor of dying in your sleep?!

Well, if you just don’t want to act like a decent human being, you could simply rerack your weight to prevent a big galoot such as myself from hurling a dumbbell at you.

Or my having a female do it for me if you happen to be a woman — hey, I’m all about fairness and equal treatment, and some of you ladies are just as guilty as your douchey male counterparts in not stripping weights or reracking dumbbells.

Considering that you only come to the gym to take selfies, keeping a 10-pound free weight from smacking you upside the head and making your face un-selfiable should be all the incentive in the world to clean up after yourself.

Now shouldn’t it?!?!

Thought so!

If you think this rule might be vital in saving one of your friends or loved ones from meeting a violent end in the gym, please share it with them. You never know, you just might save their life.
Sure, they’re a scumbag and you question why you’re even friends with them…but still!
COMMENT ON FACEBOOK

Subscribe by email to monsterlonge.com

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *