Q: What’s the best protein to eat? That’s it, that’s my question. I’m not going to state whether I want to know what’s the best protein to eat to lose weight, or to build muscle, or for after a workout, or for breakfast, or before bed, or blah blah blah. Absolutely none of that!!! I’m going to leave it to your imagination to figure out exactly what I want to know! Continue reading What’s The Best Protein To Eat?
A lot of people are stuck at home all day because there’s a fucking pandemic going on.
As a so-called “fitfluencer”, now’s a perfect time to show your followers how to get an effective workout with whatever’s around and avoid the trap of eating mindlessly just because food’s around the house.
Yeah, now’s a perfect time to do that instead of, I don’t know, eating like a pig, no longer working out, and telling your followers that it’s alright to follow suit because they don’t need any more stress in their lives having to deal with the current uncertainty.
As a so-called “fitfluencer”, throwing your hands in the air and having your followers do likewise just doesn’t make sense.
Hmmmmmmmm…
*the light bulb goes on in my head*
Wait, doing that doesn’t make sense until you realize that it makes all the sense in the world because now’s a perfect time to set things up to get yourself fat and out of shape so you can have an epic before and after quarantine transformation, a change you’ll say is owed to a magical diet and exercise program you created, which you’ll sell to your followers with promises of it helping to lose the weight you helped them gain when you told them it was alright to stop giving a fuck and put their goals on hold.
Yeah, now’s a perfect time for that!
noun [ahrmz]
1. the male glutes — i.e. they’re trained every single day and are the only thing that’s worked out because they’re the only muscle group that exists. see also: SNEAK DISS
Example of Arms in a Sentence
I worked on my arms yesterday. And the day before that. And the day before that. And the day before that. And the day before that. Hmmmm…I wonder what I’m gonna work on tomorrow. Hmmmm…
2. used by guys to mean only the biceps, not also the triceps and forearms, which is much like how women say they’re working out their legs and give the impression of working out their entire lower body when they actually just mean the glutes. see also: TRANSLATION
Example of Arms in a Sentence
We’re going on our millionth exercise for the biceps and I’m starting to think there’s been some confusion here. When you told me you were training arms today and I agreed to join in with you, I was under the idea that we were also going to hit the triceps instead of only doing exercise after fucking exercise for the bis. This is obviously my mistake for assuming!
Louis Vuitton is getting into the fitness game, with the luxury brand’s first entry being a pair of 6 lbs dumbbells at a retail price of $2,720.
I know your first reaction is to scoff at that because, you know, you’re broke and your natural broke tendencies are overriding your thinking faculties.
Sure, you should normally expect to pay anywhere in the ballpark of $1.50 to $2.00 per pound of weight for dumbbells.
However, we’re not living in normal times!!!
As a result of the coronavirus pandemic forcing the closure of gyms across the land, regular gym-goers have had to scramble to set up home gyms, making workout equipment a sizzling hot commodity.
Well, you don’t need to be Alfred Marshall to understand what that means!
Yup, driven by supply and demand (and outright greed), sellers on Ebay, Craigslist, and elsewhere are charging exorbitant sums for weights.
In fact, those profiteers are charging such ridiculous markups for fitness equipment that when you do the math, $2,720 for a pair of 6 lbs Louis Vuitton dumbbells that aren’t going to do shit for your body is actually a bargain!
Gold’s Gym is permanently closing 30 locations and 24 Hour Fitness is one of many companies mulling bankruptcy as shelter-in place orders have put a hold on virtually all moneymaking activities across several industries.
I don’t know how many of you know this, but in Citizens United v. FEC (2010), the Supreme Court basically cemented that corporations are people, which was in support of previous rulings extending the 14th amendment to companies.
With the host of multi-million and -billion dollar businesses that didn’t squirrel away money for a rainy day and are now having trouble staying solvent after only a few weeks of inactivity, I guess there is some truth to the idea of corporate personhood. Like, they’re just as broke as the average person who they pay pennies to live paycheck to paycheck!
