Category: ETC.

Posted on by

I Don’t Usually Do This, But…

I Don’t Usually Do This, But…

When someone says “I don’t usually do this”, they regularly do what they deny doing.

That’s 100 percent facts.

Well, that certainty is reduced to 99.999999999 percent because I DON’T USUALLY DO WHAT I’M ABOUT TO DO!!!

…

Those of you who know me personally or have been following me long enough know that I’m not a big believer in external motivation. For the most part, it’s fleeting, rendering it worthless. As a client, that’s why you don’t hear me uttering words of encouragement. And as a subscriber or follower, that’s why you don’t see me posting motivational quotes and other vapid shit on any of my platforms.

Additionally, my job isn’t to motivate you. That’s your fucking job. My job is to take already motivated people and make them better.

With that said, I just ran into a quote that I actually like so I’m sharing it below because it encapsulates a point, that of staying the course with something rather than doing what so many do, which is deviate from a plan and/or quit.

The habit of persistence is the habit of victory.

– Herbert Kaufman, someone neither of us are familiar with

SUBSCRIBE

No spam guarantee.

Monster Longe
Latest posts by Monster Longe (see all)

Posted on by

By Any Means Necessary

By Any Means Necessary

As much as we’re different, we’re all alike in many ways.

One of the ways we share traits is that we all fail to do what we’re supposed to do in some aspect of our lives while having no difficulty doing what we’re supposed to do in another area. We all do this, even me…and I’m fucking PERFECT!

For example, you might not make it to the gym on a consistent basis but have a stellar attendance record at work or school (you don’t have stellar attendance at work or school, but just play along with me here!).

Speaking to me, as much as my nutrition and training has been spot-on throughout the years, the quantity of sleep has been garbage. I’ve routinely dropped the ball on going to sleep at a reasonable time so I can get adequate rest to let my body repair itself.

In essence, we fall short in doing what we need to do in one place but come up big in another, with that area we’re missing the mark on being something that we know we have to fix but just can’t muster up the umph to. Well, this is how to make yourself do what you need to do!

What the author calls for in that link you’re about to click is drastic, but sometimes that’s what’s necessary.

…and in your case, it’s absolutely necessary!

SUBSCRIBE

No spam guarantee.

Monster Longe
Latest posts by Monster Longe (see all)

Posted on by

All Praise Is Welcomed

All Praise Is Welcomed

A new online coaching client tried to attribute their clearer skin to the changes I made to their diet, with them consuming less fat than they did before working with me.

Never one to shy away from taking credit for things I need not take credit for, I accepted the thanks.

Hey, you better catch the roses while you’re still alive and people are throwing them at you, so you’re damn right I took the motherfucking credit…

…but only after I told her that the connection between oily food and oily skin isn’t causative and she still continued heaping appreciation my way because, fuck, how could she not be appreciative?!

After all, I’m her fucking coach and I’ve succeeded where others have failed in doing things to change her body!!!

Anyway, like I was saying before my humility got the best of me, oily food has nothing to do with oily skin.

Well, at least not sometimes!

SUBSCRIBE

No spam guarantee.

Monster Longe
Latest posts by Monster Longe (see all)

Posted on by

But I Don’t Wanna!!!

But I Don’t Wanna!!!

I get it.

Your life sucks and you have no energy or desire to go to your crappy ass job, take care of your crappy ass kids, or be in that crappy ass relationship with that crappy ass person you’re in a crappy ass relationship with, let alone go to the gym to work on your crappy ass body.

Concerning the first few things, I don’t know what to tell you because this is a fucking fitness and nutrition blog.

What, you think I’m your fucking psychiatrist?!

As for how to get yourself to work out when you’re depressed?

Damn, if only there was something for you to click and read…

SUBSCRIBE

No spam guarantee.

Monster Longe
Latest posts by Monster Longe (see all)

Posted on by

Oops!… I Did It Again

Oops!… I Did It Again

I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’m very good with turns of phrases.

Well, about three years ago now, a client of mine who still trains with me because I’m just that lovable proposed that I start making t-shirts with my patented “Monsterisms” on them to help promote my brand. That thought has since sat idle as I’ve directed my energy towards the many other things I have going on.

That is, until now!

You see, I recently started a rewards program to give people points for completing certain actions, with them eligible to redeem their points for a bevy of prizes. One of those prizes is a free t-shirt. Well, my client who initially proposed the t-shirt idea is very close to accumulating the amount of points necessary to win a free t-shirt, which has now put pressure on me to finally get to work on them.*

And get to work I have!

Thus far, I have ideas for three t-shirts, with two of them already designed and the third just needing to be transferred from my brain to a template. The next step is getting them screen printed and then distributed.

What does this have to do with you?

You mean, besides the fact that you’ll be more fashionable in one of my tees, which will be made available for sale and for free via contests and other shit?

Hmmmmmmm…

Well, if you’re having trouble starting towards a goal, it might be beneficial to create something that places pressure on you to begin it. For example, if you still haven’t began working towards your New Year’s resolution to get in better shape before the end of the year, a goal which renders itself to an arbitrary start date, it might be better to shoot to lose 8 lbs in the two months between now and the wedding of the idiot who decided to make you a member of the wedding party.

…and then you go on from there.

Yeah, I did it again.

I found a way to tie something non-fitness related into fitness.

I know, I never cease to amaze!

*email me for details about the rewards program, if you’re interested

SUBSCRIBE

No spam guarantee.

Monster Longe
Latest posts by Monster Longe (see all)