verb [trey·ning]
the act of performing physical activity that’s structured around what needs to be done to produce a specific and desired result in the near or distant future, such as shaving time off a 5K, biking more miles, bench pressing a certain amount of weight, doing pull-ups from a dead hang and no longer performing kipping pull-ups like a man who doesn’t have a shred of respect for himself, etc.
noun [steer·oidz]
synthetic variants of the male hormone testosterone that are taken to enhance performance and/or improve physical appearance while denying the taking of them to enhance performance and/or improve physical appearance.
Example of Steroids in a Sentence
Me?! On steroids?!?! Are you *gasp* judging me based on my appearance, as you probably should based on my looking every bit like Arnold Schwarzenegger in a lousy wig and padded bra? Well, to that I say someone — YOU!!! — is revealing themselves for the terrible sexist they are in thinking that a woman such as myself can’t achieve the same level of muscularity as a man with nothing else but her own hard labor alone! And to think, it’s the 21st fucking century and us women still have to put up with this nonsense. Down with the patriarchy! DOWN WITH THE PATRIARCHY!!!
noun [uh·mee·noh as·id]
a building block of protein that isn’t strewn about haphazardly on the ground by your child and your bare foot is then magnetically drawn to step on by accident and bring about a level of pain that temporarily, but rightfully, makes you rue the day they were conceived. see also: LEGOS
Example of Amino Acid in a Sentence
There are a total of 20 amino acids that comprise proteins. I bet you a gazillion dollars that you can’t name nan one of them!
noun [poh·zing room]
a private room with mirrors on the walls that allows competitive bodybuilders to strip down and get a 360-degree view of their bodies but makes much more sense to use as a private room to do push-ups, yoga, and other dumb shit that can be done elsewhere in the gym.
noun [yoh·guh pants]
1. a subset of leggings but with more performance attributes, such as a higher and wider waistband that helps keep the pants in place to prevent them from falling down and giving people even more of a show than they’re already getting because there’s only but so much hoeing that can be done with plausible deniability while working out.
2. article of clothing people were able to perform yoga without for thousands of years before its creation and marketing by apparel manufacturers who were able to convince millions of women that bending over in all sorts of provocative poses in public settings around men is better done in tight, stretchy bottoms than in looser shape-concealing garments that don’t reveal everything.
3. leggings designed for the purpose of performing yoga in comfort but are mostly the default clothing option for a lot of women for whom the closest they’ll ever get to downward facing dog is doggystyle with their face buried in a pillow.
