Healthy Easter Tips
So you’ve just settled on a totally inappropriate Easter Bunny costume for an Easter party you’re going to that’s going to have children all over the place because that’s who the holiday is really for.1What do rabbits have to do with Easter? More specifically, egg-laying rabbits that don’t exist?!?!
HOW THE FUCK WOULD I KNOW?!
Sheesh, people! I’m just a personal trainer, not a pagan symbolist!!! And as a personal trainer, I can only offer advice about how to go about celebrating the holiday while also being mindful of your weight, if you even care about all that fat you’re carrying, which is what I’m gonna do if you continue reading on! With your spring Halloween costume out of the way, all that’s left to lose sleep over is how you’re going to deal with the goodies.
So what should you do?
Well, what you should definitely do is eat the carrot cake!
…and those Peeps!
…and that Cadbury creme egg!
…and that bag of pastel M&Ms!
…and that entire 32 oz Palmer Big Binks chocolate bunny that’ll have some incessant vegan at the party bitching and moaning to you about eating animals because vegans are that fucking annoying that they’d even bitch and moan about eating an animal made out of chocolate!
Yes, what you should definitely do is eat all of that shit without giving a single fuck in the world!!!
What you definitely shouldn’t do is eat all of that shit and then hop on an elliptical, treadmill, or StairMaster, crank it up, and then be a cardio bunny in an effort to burn off all of those calories! As long as you’ve been on track the days and weeks prior, one day of eating shit isn’t going to fuck you up.
So live a little!!!
NOTE: If you have stupid goals and actually want some healthy Easter tips to celebrate Easter without going completely off your eating plan, then you might want to check out some holiday eating tips to help you have a boring but healthy Easter Sunday.
Glossary: calories, personal trainer, StairMaster, treadmill
