How To Save Money On Protein Powder
You’re broke.1Excuse me, I meant you’re “financially unrealized”, a euphemism that softens the stigma of your economic condition by looking toward the future to suggest that what you’re suffering in the here and now isn’t poverty but just a simple case of not being rich yet.
The reason?2You mean, other than the crappy job you’re overqualified for but are stuck working because you can’t find a job in the field you accrued a load of student debt for because (1) the economy’s bad, (2) the labor market is oversaturated and you don’t stand out enough to differentiate yourself from everybody else, and (3) you lack the drive to start your own business rather than depending on someone else for employment?
Well, what’s making you broke is the protein powder that you’re not only buying when you can meet your protein needs with food but are also paying more for than you probably should!3Aargh, I did it again! I meant to use “financially unrealized” instead of being so politically incorrect by using the term “broke” to ground you in the economic present and remind you that you’re always going to be closer to impoverishment than the patrician interests you align yourself with on the off-chance that you’ll defy the odds and be as rich as them someday. My apologies!
So how do you save money on protein powder?
By way of your most favoritest thing ever, which is math, of course!
TO DETERMINE PRICE:
Divide the total price by the number of servings. The result is the cost per serving.4NOTE: If the result falls anywhere between $0.6 to $0.8 per serving, then the powder is priced at the average cost. If the result is towards the lower end or even lower, then it’s a pretty cheap protein, making it more susceptible to consist of more fillers than actual protein, which means you’d be wasting your money. If the result is towards the higher end or even higher, then it’s priced as a premium protein, which doesn’t erase the possibility that it also consists of more fillers than actual protein.
TO DETERMINE QUALITY:
Look on the nutrition facts panel for the grams of protein per serving and then multiply that number by 4 to get the protein calories. After you do that, divide the protein calories by the total calories in a serving.5NOTE: The result is the protein-to-calories percentage (P/Cal). The closer the P/Cal is to 100 percent, the more actual protein you’re buying rather than filler ingredients, such as creatine, glycine, taurine, beta-alanine, and other free-form amino acids and nitrogen-rich nutrients that are used to artificially inflate the protein quantity.
In marketing, convenience goods are products and services that consumers buy regularly and with little thought or effort because they already have a general idea of what the price should be. One such example is your protein powder, which you don’t treat as a shopping good by doing research on to compare and contrast the cost, value, and specifications between competing items like you would a car, flight, refrigerator, couch, or house before their more infrequent purchase.
Treating protein powder as a convenience good rather than a shopping good can result in you paying more for it than you actually think you are. Additionally, when protein powder falls short of containing as much of the main ingredient in it as advertised, that’s money down the drain.
So because you’re a wage-slave who wasn’t born into wealth accrued from the superexploitation of others at the hands of your disappointingly moral forebears, it’s probably a good idea for you to change your buying behavior when it comes to protein powder so you can keep a few more shekels in your pocket!
Glossary: calories
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