noun [ded·lift]
a pull movement that calls for lifting a barbell off the ground from a bent-over position until the torso is erect; usually performed with more weight than it should be performed with by lifters who want to hurry up to wheelchair living because they have a general dislike for walking and the spine’s role in it. see also: EGO
verb [skwot]
to lower your hips and bend your knees until they’re at least 90 degrees before recovering from whatever hallucination you’re having because that’s the only instance you ever get that low. see also: INCHES
noun [week·end]
the period of time between Friday evening and Sunday night when you suddenly can’t eat the shit you’ve shown the discipline not to eat all week. see also: REALLY?!?!
noun [muh·tab·uh·liz·uh m]
1. the sum of the things the body does to turn food into the energy needed to perform a myriad of functions, like thinking, breathing, and contracting every other muscle than the target muscle that should be involved in a lift but isn’t because you lift like your name is Branch Warren when your name clearly ISN’T Branch Warren. see also: GOOGLE SEARCH
2. the rate at which you burn calories, which, in your qualified medical opinion, you think is running slow and is why you can’t lose weight because you changing little, if anything, about how much food you eat certainly — CERTAINLY!!! — can’t have anything to do with it. see also: FULL RETARD
noun [tuh·mawr·oh]
a period in time removed from the present when new exercise programs and diets will begin rather than the person in pursuit of change doing the unthinkable and just starting immediately. see also: NEVER
